I wanna be Forever young

It sounds so corny to say that but you guys get it, right?. No it´s actually really lame . I want to turn 18 but not really. I feel so old and I constantly feel like I don´t  have had time for everything I want to do in this life . So really 18 isnot that bad , but then you become 19 then 20,25,32,49 etc . And I do not want to grow up yet. I do not want to sit and pay bills, I do not want to move in to my own Place, although I live in a dormroom by myself righ now.  I do not want to start taking responsibility and I do not want to sit at a job from 9-5 . But at the same time I wanna graduate, I wanna work. But I constantly feel like I want so much more, but I ‘m afraid to not catch everything.

I really want nothing more than to turn 18 so I can do what I want, take my driving license , make my  own decisions. It´s feels like time goes too fast. I do not want stuff like that big responsibility. Though I would of course nothing more than to turn 18. I can´t Believe that I´m 17 years old and have age anxiety ? I just now and realize how silly that may sound.

Now you may understand why Peter Pan said ”No don´t grow up, it´s a trap”

That´s exactlly how I feel. When you were little, you wanted nothing more then to become an adult. I have always felt older than I am. At the same time I want to be forever 21. Do you even get this???Being on my ”own” this last 6 mounth I now realized what it means to be an adult so I do not want to grow up. And  do all that boring stuff like adults do. But I also want to be an independent Young woman and take my own Life decitions.
I still believe that I’m afraid to grow up. I want 3 children when I’m big but if you really sacrifice himself and his life for someone else. Are you ready for it? I do not know if it’s all the hormones that are spinning around in my head or not, but I do not want to get big or adult I wanna be forever young.



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